what are we doing with our lives?

Money. Go. First.

That’s what the majority of this society are thinking. Those “naive” – “innocent” answers of a girl who only knows to strip for money are now praised as if it’s something rare and precious. No matter how wrong that idea is, people agree with it, not because they don’t know it’s wrong. Just because it’s bluntly true.

What happens with dreams? What happens with courage? What happens with dignity? Pride? Love? Generosity? Whatever it is as long as it is not materialistic?

They just all disappear. or get blur. or be caught up somewhere. : )

The stinking education system makes schooling some kind of burden. We do not learn, we suffer. We live day by day, test after test, knowing we are not learning something we will later on use in life. Even moral, or ethics. Dreams got trapped. Courage got killed. Love got criticized. A degree doesn’t mean much. There are a million ways of getting a job. Being smart and active and intelligent is just minor one of them. Then money comes even before that. Money, again.

I am not any exception. I believe from the very beginning, my ultimate goal in studying, spending those hard days sitting on the table, cramming books, “shitting” finals is just to get a job, to earn money. Whatever I do, money has its own voice in it. Even if it’s voluntary work, it’s still building up my CV and then helps me get a good job. That’s mere logic. I somehow feel that  I understand the stripping girl’s want of helping her family. I do, too. And trying that much hard is how I do it, especially how my mother sacrifice her whole life for her kids. But I don’t sell myself for money, and that’s the difference.

Yesterday I have a very serious and meaningful talk with an honor man. He showed me some very basic principles in life that I used to ignore. He showed me the key to true happiness, for a girl like me. For any girl in this world. I realize my true mission in this life. Not what I truely want at this very moment, but it’s something I have to make a choice, something when I myself realize it, it might be too late. A choice that will destine my life journey. And money, luckily, is not it. Above all, family and love prevails. Keep that in mind, with a bunch of other precious knowledge that I am fated to get to know, I will have the base for my every decision. This is smart. Not “nice”, not “innocent”, not “ngoan”. Smart. I need it more.

This entry is pretty messed up. Exactly as who I am now. Messed up in the middle of choices, dreams, what is right and what is wrong, is there anything that is absolutely no, or certainly yes? However, just by being true to the nature of who I am born with, I am sure that I will have my stubborn yet very strong steps in life. Without having to put money above all else.

And for that, I create my own destiny. Dare to dream again. And be courageous.

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7 thoughts on “what are we doing with our lives?

  1. Haha yes, whatever happened to dignity and pride? Moral values are way too fragile in this material-dominated world. People praising her “virtue” of honesty just goes to show how this money-obsessed culture has become a given, how it’s almost second nature to forego own ethics in exchange for money. Either that, or they’re just too in love with her tits and ass to notice anything else.

    And I’m getting increasingly sickened by the idea that the only way you can “prove yourself” in this world is by earning the largest amount of money possible. What are we doing with our lives? Shitting ourselves through highly pressurised education environments in order to get pressurised jobs that pay shitloads of money so that we may in turn put our children into another prestigious pressure cooker… and the loop goes on.

    Hope you (and I) can find the middle-ground someday.

  2. Funny it may be, but I actually agree (to some extent) with that girl’s statements =)
    Not to comment on her “virtues”, or her (probably) selling herself for money, but I think there is nothing wrong to find a good man that you can depend on and be proud of it. I’ve believed for all my life that a woman’s greatest success in life would be to find a man you can trust and depend on (emotionally AND financially) and build a happy family with him = ) The problem is that, this society – including both the ones who support her and the ones who criticize her – has not (and will not in anytime soon) grasped the definition of being “enough”. I find myself never be able to become someone like her, because her dependence on her man does not stop at bringing happiness and well-being to her family, it also includes heaps of expensive clothes, bags and supercars just for show-off purpose. Having enough to keep your family happy is different from being a show-off elite-wanna be, and by being excessive only did she make her beauty and herself a trading good = )

    The above is kinda long, but what I want to say is life needs moderation, and being “enough” is the optimal choice. It takes a superwoman to earn heaps of money, raise her kids well (physically and emotionally) AND being pretty and caring so that her man won’t be snatched by some young girl. We’re (pretty) normal (hmmm I’m not so sure lol), thus we should opt for some balance of the mean, not pushing some aspect to the extreme and neglect others.

    To Dx: I know that one of your main reason to exert yourself because you don’t want to be inferior to your man later in life. That is alright, if you choose it to be a component of your happiness. But carefully think about your priorities later in life, when you have your own family to worry about. Independence in good, but too much focus on that and you will end up alone (it’s true that men always like a little bit of domination, so we need to give them that feeling to some extent lol, it’s an art). Keep your pride, but never be too proud. We should know better than anyone that a kid will grow up best when having both mom and dad’s attention.

    Nói chung là làm con gái mệt lắm, phải nghĩ đủ đường. Chùng mình còn trẻ đừng nên quá kiên định với một kiểu nghĩ nào vội, cứ tự điều chỉnh dần dần thôi. Từ lúc mình xác định là mình sẽ chẳng bon chen đua đòi làm gì mà cứ sống nhẹ nhàng và cố gắng có 1 gia đình bình thường hạnh phúc không cần quá giàu chả cần quá giỏi mình rất thoải mái :3 Sống là cho mình trước tiên, xã hội nhìn vào thế nào quan trọng j (à đấy thực ra khâm phục NT phết biết đạp lên dư luận mà sống vui vẻ lol).

  3. tam huyet qua hihi
    uh that could be one of the things i meant by “middle ground” :)
    noi chung la nguy hiem lam, de~ sau nay tao lam crazy cat lady lam =))

  4. ah btw my main reason is not to avoid “being inferior to my man” (if any) later in life. it’s just basic survival you know, because I know i’m not the type (xinh enough +ngoan enough) that men would be willing to “take care of” financially =))) Ko lam ra tien thi ca.p dat ma an!

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